Losing A Friend
by AnthropologistGirlInTheMaking
Summary: Brennan has become very sick, and knows that she is going to die. Booth has set himself to taking care of her, deeply worried about her health, especially when she worsens and they learn that nothing can be done for her. Based of the Japanese song "Soundless Voice". One-shot, but may become a full-blown story. Warning: Character Death
1. Losing A Friend

~Hey, everybody! Onto my next story of choice: a one-shot that I've based off a song, which was written by Hitoshizuku-P, a Japanese song-writer. The song, the first in a triology, was sung by two of the voices/characters from the famous Japanese vocal-program, Vocaloid. The song in question is called "Soundless Voice", sung by Kagamine Len (Len Kagamine, for those who put their first name first). The next in the trilogy are "Proof of Life", sung by Kagamine Rin (Rin Kagamine for those who put first name first), and the last is "Endless Wedge", sung by Kagamine Len. I chose to use "Soundless Voice" because it was the first of the songs I heard, and to be honest, made me cry, as did "Proof of Life".

Basically, Brennan [in this song, this would be Rin], has become very sick, and knows that she is going to die. Booth [in the song, this would be Len] has set himself to taking care of her, deeply worried about her health, especially when she worsens and they learn that nothing can be done for her. In the end, she dies with Booth wishing he had been able to tell her that he loved her [among other things]. [This piece begins just after she has died, but, if you guys review and let me know what you think, I may go back and start from when they just learn she's gotten sick, and go from there until where she's died.]

I have changed a few things from the song and P.V. that I watched, so if you want to see the Kagamine's video, simply search up "Soundless Voice" Kagamine Len on Youtube, and take a look. The video I watched was by "motokokusanagi2009", so I thank them for putting up the video for me. Warning: You may cry. I sure did.

I apologize for this long author's note, but I hope you took the time to take a look through it to understand my basis for the story. Now that it's done, continue below to keep reading!

* * *

"Booth..." His name escaped her lips on a barely-there whisper, the single word she'd spoken sounding pained. Uselessly, she stretched one arm partially out in front of her in the direction of where he stood on the top of the hill a little ways from her, but before she could call for him in a hopefully louder tone, her breath whooshed out of her lungs as she crumpled to the snow-covered ground. Struggling to breathe, a single tear traced its way down her cheek as she realized that her time was finally up. Booth, who was looking out at the rest of the park, facing the opposite direction on the top of the hill, called out to her.

"Bones! You've gotta see this!" When he didn't get any answer from her, he paused. "Bones? What didja do, run back to the car?" Turning around, he looked around, unable to spot her anywhere in the park. "Bones?" He called again. Looking down, he froze when he saw her tiny, frail body lying unmoving in the snow, splayed out as if she'd only meant to make a snow angel. "Bones?!" Almost tripping over his own legs, he stumbled down the side of the hill, falling to his knees beside her. Brennan, who was by now just barely breathing, looked up at him with eyes that were rapidly dulling.

"Oh God, Bones." His voice cracked as he spoke, and he pulled her up out of the snow into his arms. "We have to get you to the hospital." She gave a barely discernible shake of her head.

"Too..." She let out a tiny cough, still struggling to suck air into her tortured lungs. "...Late..." Booth shook his head furiously, moving to stand up.

"You're gonna be fine. We've just gotta let the doctor get a good look at you. He'll fix you. He knows what to do." While Booth was babbling, Brennan struggled to simply lift her hand press it against his chest. Upon managing it, but failing to get his attention, she looked up towards the sky, where the snow that had been lightly falling before began to fall heavier. A second tear sliding down her cheek, her eyes fell closed as she let out her final breath. Booth, too busy with trying to reassure her that she'd be alright, didn't take any notice. "- I promised you you'd be fine, and you will be!" He finished, looking down at her as he stood, expecting some sort of reprimand. Realizing that she was now lifeless in his arms, he stiffened, falling back to his knees into the snow.

"Bones?" He whispered, brushing her hair out of her face. "Come on. You gotta wake up." Tears had begun to well in his eyes, and he was fighting hard to keep from crying. "Bones, please... I can't lose you..." Allowing the tears to fall, he pulled her body close to him, and, falling into silence, sat there for what could have been minutes or hours. Eventually, he once again opened his eyes, wincing as he felt the tear tracks that had frozen in the cold air on his face. Looking down as his partner, he gently touched her cold cheek.

"I'm so sorry, Bones." He whispered. "I knew I shouldn't have agreed to take you out here. If I hadn't you might still be alive." He took a deep, shaky breath. "You'd still be here with me. I don't know how you expect me to be able to live without you... I should've told you how I felt about you before this happened..." Upset, a flash of anger shot through him. "It should me lying dead right now, not you. You never should've been sick."

Images of his partner through the last few months of her illness flashed through his mind:

Brennan, smiling sweetly at Parker as she told him that she was sick, but not to worry about her.

Booth, going crazy when he found her trying to hide the fact that she had just coughed up blood.

Angela, demanding that Brennan go home and take time off of work immediately.

Brennan, holding the coffee mug that Parker had painted for her and given her as a gift, meaning to take a sip and instead having the mug slip from her fingers and crash on the floor due to weakening muscles.

Parker, trying to cheer her up after finding her crying in her bedroom a little after the incident.

Booth, finding Brennan on her bedroom floor, coughing and having earlier vomited at least twice, blood covering her hands and the area around her, looking up at him with sad, scared eyes.

Brennan, just earlier that day, practically begging him to take her out for a walk, saying that she was going crazy from being stuck inside all the time.

Shaking his head to clear out the last couple images, he shakily got to his feet, holding Brennan's body close in his arms, he headed back towards his SUV, and after using his cell phone let Angela and Hodgins know what had happened, called Cam, who immediately drove over to find him sitting outside, still holding Brennan in his arms.

"I'm so sorry, Booth," She whispered, leaning down to give him a hug. "You shouldn't have been alone when it happened." She squeezed his arm before pulling out her phone to make a call.

~BxB~

Later that evening, Booth sat in his apartment alone, the tears that had been falling for hours having finally run dry. He had one of Brennan's scarves in his hands, and while he was still full of grief, her scent, left on the scarf, calmed him, but only just.

Sighing, he curled himself down on the couch, refusing to return to his bedroom; the place where Brennan had been sleeping the past couple months after relenting to Booth's insistent pleas of that it would just be easier for him to help her that way. Despite the fact that his mind was running a mile a minute, he managed to drop off into a troubled sleep.

In his dream, all he did was re-live what he'd experienced earlier that day. Brennan was dying in his arms, over and over again, and every time, he was always unable to do a thing to save her. As he twitched about on the couch, the dream continued, refusing to end. In the end, it changed. He'd repeated the speech he'd said another time, and was about to have it start all over when his dream-self felt a warm presence of sorts around him. Lifting his head, he didn't see anything, but, surrounded by whatever it was, he felt loved.

_It's not your fault that I died, Booth._

His head shot up again, and he looked at his partner's body in confusion, but found that she was still dead.

_It was time. Don't feel bad about. I understand that you are upset, but you don't need to be. You've given me so much... A life that I never imagined I could have. I always thought that I'd just be alone, but then you turned up, and gave me things that were nothing I'd expected. I will always be grateful to you, Booth._

He quivered, now almost certain that he'd heard her voice, and desperately tried to figure out where it was coming from.

_Despite that I am no longer alive, and I highly doubt that I'll be "living" anywhere else, know that although I never told you, I do love you, and I'll miss you. Just...don't smack yourself up about it. You'll be fine without me. Thank you for everything, Booth. _

He let out a low chuckle at the mistake she'd made in that sentence, and gave a slow nod. "I know I will be eventually, Bones." He murmured. "I'm glad I could make you happy." With a sigh, he closed his eyes and stood, trudging back in the direction of the car.

~BxB~

Startled, Booth woke, jerking up into a seated position. Remnants of the end of his dream flooded his mind, and he let out a soft sigh, clutching the scarf he still held tighter in his fist. Despite his sadness, the words that Brennan had "spoken" in his dream began to make him wonder if she had truly thought that in life. The first smile that had crossed his lips since she'd died that morning appeared on his face, and with a quick glance at the picture of the pair of them laughing and goofing around that he had on his table, curled back down to go to sleep, believing that in some way, she was still with him, being her happy, old, healthy self, just not in the way she was before.

He knew that he'd always miss her; that was given. But he also knew that eventually, he'd get over the loss, and be able to move on with his life, always keeping her with him in his memories, and in his heart.

* * *

So, there it is! I'm not sure how much I like that ending. I just...don't like it, but I really don't know what else I could've written. Oh well.

Also, have any of you seen the Bones season 8 promo that they have out? My God, Brennan is _blonde_. I understand _why _she's currently got blonde hair, being on the run and all, but... Anyone else just a little freaked out? Blonde hair really doesn't work for her, I'm sorry, but no. Just no.

Anyways, I'd love to hear what you think, so please, leave a review!


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, so, I'm going to be totally straight with everyone here. No, I have no idea what illness Brennan has. xD I just know what symptoms I want her to have, including muscle weakness and coughing [etc] up blood, that sort of thing, but I don't know what illness would have those. If you can tell me something, I'd gladly take suggestions.

Now, getting to the point, I read the reviews I've gotten, and am surprised to see just how many people were affected by the sadness in the chapter. I'm glad that at least some people seem to like it though, regardless. But, I have decided to try to write a bit more. My updates will probably be all over the place, since I don't always have time to write [especially with school having started] and don't always have the inspiration, but I will try.

A quick shout-out to some reviewers:

Guest: Don't worry. Not everything is going to be sad. There will be some happy moments. ;)

speaknowbeloud: I'm glad to know that you think that this was well-written. I wasn't sure if it was my best work, but it's good to know.

And I totally agree. If Hart did something like that... He'd have a mob of angry Bones fans hammering on his front door. And I'd probably be one of them. :P

* * *

~11 months earlier~

Fiddling with the dolphin ring on her finger, Brennan was silent as her partner drove her in the direction of her apartment, having already refused to return her to the lab. As they slowed to a stop at a red light, she let out a soft, unbidden sigh.

"I'm sorry, Bones." Booth gave her a sideways glance, and reached over to give her shoulder a soft squeeze. She didn't look at him, but the shaky breath she took said enough. "You're a strong woman. You'll get through this."

"That is highly unlikely, Booth." Brennan replied. "My illness is bound to kill me, whether it takes years or months to do so." Despite the fact that she'd never admit it, she was secretly terrified. Returning her attention to the scenery outside of her window, she watched it go by as her apartment drew closer. "Can't I just go back to work? I don't understand why you're insisting that I go home. My time would be much better used at the lab."

"No, Bones." He replied. "You just learned that you're very ill. You need time to relax, and get used that fact. You aren't going to the lab."

"But-"

"Don't argue with me." He took his eyes off of the road for a moment to look at her. "If I have to tie you to something to get you to not go to work, I will." Brennan's eyes widened and she stared at him.

"You wouldn't dare." The mischievous, yet completely serious look he shot at her told her that he would. "Booth..." She warned, shaking her head. "This is one of those times when I really do hate you."

BxB

After Booth sort of relented, instead taking her for lunch at the diner rather that back to the lab, Brennan sat in silence in her bedroom, her laptop perched on her lap as she stared at the document for the new book she was writing. Booth had left to go back to work a couple hours before, and she was now alone. Her fingers hovered over the keys, but she was unsure of what to write. Letting out an irritated sigh, she closed the document and slammed the lid closed, pushing the computer to the side. Tucking her knees to her chest, she buried her face in her hands, the true realization of what was happening to her finally coming into focus. Her body shaking with her silent sobs, she didn't hear Booth return to the apartment.

"Bones?" He called out, and frowned when he got no response. _She better not have gone to the lab._ He thought crossly, heading in the direction of the one door he had never actually gone through, assuming it was her bedroom. _She promised me she wouldn't._ "Where are you?" Twisting the knob, he gently pushed open the door, his heart breaking as he took in the sight in front of him.

"Oh, Bones." He murmured, crawling onto her bed and enveloping her in a hug. She turned in his arms and burst into audible sobs, burying her face in the side of his neck. "Shh." He whispered, gently stroking her hair as she clung to him. "It's alright... You're going to be alright." Pulling her into his lap, he sat in silence while she cried; using one hand to grab the box of Kleenex she kept on the bedside table. Taking one, he lifted her head and gently wiped her eyes, hugging her close again once he was done.

"I didn't have to go if you were feeling so upset, Bones." He murmured, secretly enjoying the way she was snuggling close to him, although he hated the reason why. He shook his head. "What am I saying? I shouldn't have left you alone no matter what you told me." She looked up at him.

"I'm fine, Booth." She replied, her voice shaking. "I simply had a mild emotional breakdown. It has nothing to do with you." Deciding that he'd rather not fight with her, especially since she was upset, he sat with her in silence, keeping her calmer than she would've been if he hadn't been there while she worried about herself.

They sat there for a couple of hours, until Booth decided that it was up to him to try and cheer her up, even if only for a short while. Lowering his hands, he gently ticked her sides, and she let out a loud, very un-Brennan-like squeal.

"Booth!" She wailed, squirming in his arms. "No!" Booth chuckled softly, ducking as she just about whacked him in the face. She squealed again, desperately trying to get away from him, failing each time. "Stop!" Snickering at her reaction, he tickled her once more for good measure, wincing as she swatted his hand.

"Sorry, Bones," He apologized. "You just looked so sad. I didn't know what else to do!" She scowled at him, poking him in the ribs, all of her worries momentarily forgotten as she watched _him_ squirm away, arms flailing.

"You're a real pain, Booth." She muttered, shaking her head with a sigh. "But I appreciate the effort." Leaning up, she, somewhat awkwardly, kissed him on the cheek. Needing to escape and, seeing that it was getting late, she blinked. "I'm...going... to go order Thai, or something. You okay with that?" She questioned. Upon getting a nod, she used her excuse to run out of the room, leaving Booth to watch her leave with a confused expression on his face.

BxB

A good twenty minutes later, the pair sat at Brennan's dining table, eating their Thai food in silence. Booth, feeling awkward, cleared his throat.

"So... Did you want me to come by and stay with you tomorrow?" Brennan gave him a curious look.

"I plan on going to work tomorrow." She replied. Before he could object, she continued. "I agreed to stay home today, and I now realized that doing so was a good idea, given my slight breakdown. It could have turned into a... very awkward situation had that happened at the lab. But I'm perfectly able to go tomorrow." Her partner frowned.

"Bones..." He murmured, his tone holding a hint of warning. Not paying attention, he didn't realize what she planned to do before she flicked a noodle in his direction, watching as it got stuck to his forehead. "Wha-?" He blinked, reaching up to tug it off. Brennan gave him an innocent look. "Really? What are you, five?" She rolled her eyes.

"I'm am quite clearly not a small child. But, that was payback for earlier, Booth." Winking at him, she returned to eating. Booth shook his head with a chuckle, but rather than retaliate by throwing his own noodle, he went back to his own meal. A few moments later, Brennan sighed softly.

"You okay, Bones?" She gave a silent nod instead of an answer. Sighing, he didn't bother to press her, and reached over to grab her free hand. Giving it a gentle squeeze, he flashed her a soft smile when she gave him a look, and then they finished their meal in silence. "I guess...I'm going to go, then." He said, getting up and setting his plate in the sink. "Unless you'd prefer that I'd stay. Hell, I'd prefer to stay, but knowing you, you'll probably kick me out."

"I'll be fine." She replied. "Go home. I'll see you tomorrow." She watched his reaction warily. "And _don't_ call me every half hour. I won't answer." He gave her a sheepish grin as he grabbed his coat, and she rolled her eyes. "Goodnight, Booth."

"Night, Bones." Opening the door, he turned back. "Are you sure you don't want-"

"Go home." She pushed him towards the door, leaning against it to keep him from getting back in. "Go. Now. I'll see you tomorrow." Sighing in defeat, Booth went and trudged down the hall. Brennan watched until he'd gone into the elevator and disappeared before stepping back inside and closing her door. With a sigh, she leaned up against it, running one hand through her hair before going into the kitchen to clean up the remainder of their dinner before heading off in the direction of her bedroom. Reaching her destination, she curled up on the sheets, slowly falling into a troubled sleep.


End file.
